These Silent Thoughts
by Sleets
Summary: A little fanfic I thought of... BrambleclawxSquirrelflight pairing. Typical. But well, I like writing typical stuff sometimes. Sorry, this shall be discontinued until further notice!


**Author's Note: **Not a oneshot... I just had a little inspiration, so I decided it shouldn't be wasted. But... reading it a second time, it seems pretty boring. Not such a good idea after all... but well, no more turning back. -shrugs with no indifference-

**Disclaimer:** Do I have to say this everytime? It's a disclaimer, hello...?!

**These Silent Thoughts**

Squirrelflight appeared restless, approaching the fresh-kill pile and then padding away and back again, as if she didn't quite know if she was supposed to be grabbing something to eat.

Restless… She wasn't the only one.

Hidden in the shadows of the rocky camp, a dark mould of tabby fur, his amber eyes glowing in the gloom.

Brambleclaw stared hopelessly at Squirrelflight. He didn't want her to know he was there, for if she really knew, he could only glimpse her for one last time, and that thought burns his heart. What had happened to those days where he could meet her leaf green eyes squarely and cherish the feeling he always had? What happened to those days of laughter?

For Brambleclaw, there was already an answer, which he had wanted so badly to restrain from coming out of its hiding place and overthrow his mind. Memories. They had become precious memories he tried so hard to hold on to. If he had known this would happen, he would cherish the times he had with her even more. Her playful voice was rusty in his mind, and the only voice closest to the one he had loved so much was the harsh tone she always used on him.

Brambleclaw didn't know why she was suspicious of Hawkfrost. He never did anything to tweak her tail. There wasn't anything wrong with forming a bond with his RiverClan brother; if Squirrelflight and Leafpool could have that bond, why couldn't he? Squirrelflight couldn't be more selfish to keep him from experiencing sibling relationship. Brambleclaw wished she would mind her own business.

But no. His heart was the obvious contrast to what his instinct told him to think.

When she _did _mind her own business, Brambleclaw felt as if the most important thing that had kept him going on had been drained out of him, leaving him weak and lifeless.

Did she judge him because of him father? That would explain why, Brambleclaw thought meekly. Anger burned inside his belly at the mere thought of Tigerstar. How dare he even enter his dreams? He was the cause of everything. Brambleclaw did not feel proud of a father that did not even seem like one.

But if Squirrelflight really loathe Tigerstar's blood so much, then why did she not warn Leafpool about Mothwing? Brambleclaw felt his blood turn into ice as the realization came. Maybe she just hated him…? But if she did, there was no reason why she didn't hate Tawnypelt as well? Squirreflight may be pesky, but she wasn't petty. Brambleclaw trusted that her ill-feelings for Hawkfrost weren't because she wanted attention.

If he had known this very moment would come, Brambleclaw wished he could have just died inside the cave of the sun-drown place.

That brought even worse memories. He recalled bleakly how worried Squirrelflight had been. Now, gazing despondently at the pacing ginger she-cat, Brambleclaw felt like she was another cat altogether.

-switch of POVs-

Squirrelflight paced restlessly. At one point, she was about to get some fresh-kill to eat. Ah yes… that's what she wanted to do. Distractedly, she padded towards the corner where the fresh-kills were stored in.

Her last encounter with Brambleclaw was wonderful. They had spit at each other like a Clan cat would with a rogue. Couldn't he see that Hawkfrost was not only the spitting image of Tigerstar, but also the spitting inside of Tigerstar? He had witnessed Mudclaw's dying words himself, and yet, he had to force himself not to believe it. A cat could be so stubborn. Squirrelflight hissed silently in exasperation. She had believed she was the most important cat in Brambleclaw's eyes, but clearly she was wrong. The cat she feared and mistrusted the most turned out to be Brambleclaw's most trusted cat. Why couldn't Brambleclaw see that the RiverClan tom was poisoning his mind? If he cared for Squirrelflight, he would have at least listened for once.

Squirrelflight shook her head wistfully as his words repeated themselves in her mind. All his displays of concern were lies. Whatever he had said were nothing but lies. Lies… an aching pain welled up inside her, but she forced it back. It wasn't worth being so troubled over a worthless cat.

However much she told that to herself, she couldn't be _not _troubled. It was like an annoying tick that she could not scratch off. For a tick, mouse-bile was needed. But there was no answer to what could take off that pest off her mind.

Squirrelflight felt it in her heart that she once knew the answer to that question. But however much she tried, no answer came to her.

Raising her eyes, Squirrelflight realized she was at the fresh-kill pile. Huh? Why was she here in the first place? Shaking her fur briefly, she turned away.

-switch of POVs-

Brambleclaw would give anything to get the she-cat back to his side, but it seems the she-cat wants nothing but nothing for her to return to his side. Why couldn't Squirrelflight see she was the light of his life?

Looking up, Brambleclaw saw that Ashfur had joined her, his tail touching her shoulder in an attempt to calm her down. That seemed to work, for Squirrelflight sat down and accepted the vole he offered her.

Something twisted inside his belly, a feeling Brambleclaw couldn't identify. A growl begin to form in his throat. Even if Squirrelflight choose to ignore him for life, at least she shouldn't pass him over just like that and hang out with another tom as if the days he spent with her never happened. Yet, now spying her with a sinking feeling, Brambleclaw could see she didn't care. He was just nothing except something in her past. Ashfur was her present.

Brambleclaw closed his eyes, wishing he could shut the annoying questions and dreadful thoughts echoing in his mind. When he opened them again, he started. Squirrelflight had seen him. And now she was about to interrogate him.

"Brambleclaw." She mewed coldly, her eyes glittering. "What do you want?"

Brambleclaw forced himself to meet her stone-hard stare, but he was afraid that if he did, he would not recognize the new cat there. "Sorry." He got up, his head bowed to hide his devastated eyes, and brushed past Squirrelflight.

Brambleclaw may not be feeling positive towards Squirrelflight, but he should have at least looked into those eyes.

As he stalked away, into the forest, he had failed to see the misery and longing Squirrelflight had struggled to hide.

-switch of POVs-

_I didn't want this to happen. _Squirrelflight thought sorrowfully. _But it had happened. For now, Brambleclaw, until the real you come back, you are just a cat I know._

**Okay peoples! If you think it's boring, say this as your first message: You are in the boring list. If you think it's pretty good, say this as your first message: Erm... okay... If you think it's great, say this as your first message: Worthy of my review, I guess. If you think it's... something else I didn't mention, write something else. ;) Thankies!**


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